Hello. I am Unknown. Of course that's not my real name. My real name is a seventeen-digit number that was given to me at birth and is kept in a secret file in the Library of Congress.
Ha. You really believe I think that? Of course not. I'm not stupid - I'm just paranoid. I have a condition called "apophenia" - seeing patterns where no patterns exist. Ever look up at the clouds and see shapes? Then you have apophenia, too.
Welcome to the club. Tinfoil hats optional.